Through her absolute lack of manners Tessa may have indeed done you a favor by leading you to buy those shoes that serve as a reminder of the rightness of your decision to leave that life behind.
“Little boys push, shove, and punch each other, whereas little girls tear each other’s hearts out.”
Truer words were never spoken. I wonder how true this is for many, if not all, of us women, that the first heartbreak we’ve ever experienced was perpetrated by another girl or woman we once considered a friend.
Another beautiful piece, I always enjoy reading your words. I’m so glad you’ve found your tribe of women friends, those who genuinely love, care, support, and celebrate you.
Those are SHOES! Isn't it strange how shoes that actually hobble you and make you less powerful make you feel more powerful?
A friend said to me once that I was unusual in that I genuinely want my friends (female and male) to be successful - whatever that means for them. I was amazed. Doesn't everybody? But it seems not. I have a tight group of female friends who would never throw me under the bus, but I think that's because I chose to leave the world dense with buses like that.
In reading this, of course I am taken aback by the Tessa’s of the world, but I am also so comforted by your resolute softness and integrity and your perpetual self-examination of what is meaningful and what is not.
Sometimes the contrasts we live serve only to provide us with the most profound sense of who we are and what is important to us, and gives us the courage to live differently in a world that asks for our obedience. It makes the pain of it all make sense. Poor Tessa. To be so lost in such an empty world is a curse.
Dearest, I love you (and always have ❤️) you have grown into a sophisticated, sensitive, accomplished, humble and loving bad ass!! Love your writing, love your honesty, love your storytelling ...and love your choices 👌 as you go throufh life..Keep writing ✍️ ✨️
This means so much. I've loved you since I was a little girl, and I always will. ❤️ I'll never forget your kindness and how much fun it was to stay with you at your mom's house (and when you and your sis let me get away with being naughty!) 🤭
I also remember looking through the windows of the designer stores on Rodeo Drive, telling you how I wished I could buy those clothes so I would look grown up and beautiful, and you told me I didn't need them. How prescient! You were absolutely right.
Thank you for all your wise and loving words. You were the big sister I wish I'd had. 😇
First: Those shoes! As I think the youngs say, you utterly slayyy in them!🤩
Second: What a trajectory. I feel bad for “Tessa” for not knowing what kindness truly means. She’ll learn, though. What goes around does inevitably come around.
Last: I was two years behind Sec. Albright’s youngest daughter, Katie, at our all-girls prep school in DC. All of the Albrights stood out as leaders and teammates. They were fun and friendly (even to little ol’ moi, perpetually on JV hockey and lacrosse😭). There were more “mean girls” than not in our community, but the Albrights seemed to have heeded their mama’s adage!😇
Thanks, Violet! To have a powerhouse of a mom like Sec. Albright must have been a force to behold!
I had to play hockey and lacrosse at both my boarding schools. I found those sports a little too aggressive and preferred being captain of the swim team, where I could just stay in my own lane. 😉
Through her absolute lack of manners Tessa may have indeed done you a favor by leading you to buy those shoes that serve as a reminder of the rightness of your decision to leave that life behind.
One fine lady who writes as good she looks
“Little boys push, shove, and punch each other, whereas little girls tear each other’s hearts out.”
Truer words were never spoken. I wonder how true this is for many, if not all, of us women, that the first heartbreak we’ve ever experienced was perpetrated by another girl or woman we once considered a friend.
Another beautiful piece, I always enjoy reading your words. I’m so glad you’ve found your tribe of women friends, those who genuinely love, care, support, and celebrate you.
Thank you so much.
Those are SHOES! Isn't it strange how shoes that actually hobble you and make you less powerful make you feel more powerful?
A friend said to me once that I was unusual in that I genuinely want my friends (female and male) to be successful - whatever that means for them. I was amazed. Doesn't everybody? But it seems not. I have a tight group of female friends who would never throw me under the bus, but I think that's because I chose to leave the world dense with buses like that.
You are one of life's uplifters and have always been a champion of mine. Unusual indeed, but that's what makes you gleam like a rare gemstone.
I hope I'm not that rare! Certainly I don't want to be!
In reading this, of course I am taken aback by the Tessa’s of the world, but I am also so comforted by your resolute softness and integrity and your perpetual self-examination of what is meaningful and what is not.
Sometimes the contrasts we live serve only to provide us with the most profound sense of who we are and what is important to us, and gives us the courage to live differently in a world that asks for our obedience. It makes the pain of it all make sense. Poor Tessa. To be so lost in such an empty world is a curse.
But also: THOSE SHOES
Beautifully put, as always.
It's been so fun to read your articles after meeting you in Sarah Fay's breakout session. Your storytelling is superb!
Thank you, Kelly, for taking the time to read and comment. Much appreciated!
I am appalled at your experience! It's not even about women supporting women, but about being kind human beings. When did humanity go out the window?
Wow those shoes-you look stunning in them! Your writing is beautiful and with a vulnerability I love. Thank you for sharing your stories with us!
Interesting title and so well written. Your shoe solution to “Tessa’s” betrayal was powerful and made more so by the stunning photos.
I’m really enjoying your articles Petra 👏👏👏
Dearest, I love you (and always have ❤️) you have grown into a sophisticated, sensitive, accomplished, humble and loving bad ass!! Love your writing, love your honesty, love your storytelling ...and love your choices 👌 as you go throufh life..Keep writing ✍️ ✨️
This means so much. I've loved you since I was a little girl, and I always will. ❤️ I'll never forget your kindness and how much fun it was to stay with you at your mom's house (and when you and your sis let me get away with being naughty!) 🤭
I also remember looking through the windows of the designer stores on Rodeo Drive, telling you how I wished I could buy those clothes so I would look grown up and beautiful, and you told me I didn't need them. How prescient! You were absolutely right.
Thank you for all your wise and loving words. You were the big sister I wish I'd had. 😇
I enjoyed reading this Petra. Women are often a mystery. As you say, it’s rare for us to find real friends.
On the topic, you might find my post, below, of interest. All the best.
https://open.substack.com/pub/sharonjoslyn/p/not-one-of-the-girls?r=7tva4&utm_medium=ios
Thank you, Sharon. I look forward to reading your post.
Enjoyed reading that ❤️
First: Those shoes! As I think the youngs say, you utterly slayyy in them!🤩
Second: What a trajectory. I feel bad for “Tessa” for not knowing what kindness truly means. She’ll learn, though. What goes around does inevitably come around.
Last: I was two years behind Sec. Albright’s youngest daughter, Katie, at our all-girls prep school in DC. All of the Albrights stood out as leaders and teammates. They were fun and friendly (even to little ol’ moi, perpetually on JV hockey and lacrosse😭). There were more “mean girls” than not in our community, but the Albrights seemed to have heeded their mama’s adage!😇
Thanks, Violet! To have a powerhouse of a mom like Sec. Albright must have been a force to behold!
I had to play hockey and lacrosse at both my boarding schools. I found those sports a little too aggressive and preferred being captain of the swim team, where I could just stay in my own lane. 😉